Home.

Assalamualaikum,

Home is where the heart is. But what if my heart feels no attachment to any particular place? What if I don't feel at home in Malaysia, I don't feel at home in Egypt.

I dread being anywhere at all at the moment. I dread having to think, having to be awake.

Everything is just a big mess right now.

Serenity is out of my grasp. I'm emotionally empty and spiritually void and I don't know how long this will go on. The thought of failure is embedded deep in my brain and I can't get it out. Too many thoughts, worrisome thoughts, in my head.

Home is where Allah decides for me to be. Where He will give me peace. Hopefully I'll find that place soon and get my life in order. Or truly get my life in order and He will lead me there. InsyaAllah.

Because they say home is where your heart is set in stone, 

Is where you go when you’re alone, 

Is where you go to rest your bones, 

It’s not just where you lay your head, 

It's not just where you make your bed.

Study la lanat.